| #140: You Are Your Job |
You are your job. (And vice versa.) Sorry.
December 6th, 2007
John McKee, Leadership Coach (highlights mine)
I know a few things for certain. One of them – after 30 or so years as a leadership coach and business executive – is that we cannot "compartmentalize" our lives.
This is not widely accepted. Time and again, I run into managers who don't realize that how they behave 8 or 10 hours a day will inevitably impact who they become the rest of the time. And unfortunately many companies continue to push this thinking on their employees with training that directs them to, "Be objective, don't allow your emotions to impact your decisions, and keep your personal life at home."
You can try to keep your work life separate from your home life; or your personal issues separate from your professional situation; but it just doesn't work. Not forever anyway. At some stage, who you are will show up in the ‘wrong' place. To those who still believe that they can move from one role to the other and not take the events of the other part's day with them, understand this clearly: This isn't just naïve it can be dangerous.
Consequently, it makes a lot of sense to try to be as genuine as possible in both environments – at work and with your loved ones.
Of course, the image is pretty compelling – behave and deal with each environment's issues in just the right manner. You may even think you know people who can do it: At work they seem cool and collected. Someone who never brings his baggage to the job. Always focused on the job. Alternatively, on the home front, they look like the perfect parent or spouse. Always nurturing and loving – never whining about the day at the office.
But these apparently-perfect creatures never succeed maintaining those roles forever. And the simple reason is – it can't happen. No healthy person can control both environments perfectly and do it on an ongoing basis. The therapists and shrinks are pretty well aligned on this also. Aside from people with mental illness, there simply are no people who are able to completely and totally shut off the one side from the other for a lot of years without becoming very lonely or suffering career derailment. Sure some are better at ‘containment' than others. But sooner or later it will catch up to everyone.
And then they get divorced, or fired.
At that point, these people who were so "perfect" start searching for some help. If they're fortunate, they link up with a great professional who can help them find their bearings again. They get back to being authentic, and on with life without a lot more heartache and heartburn. If not, they react to this sudden change in other ways like booze, drugs, sex, and other destructive activity.
For a well-rounded, and fully satisfying life; I suggest you learn this simply truth. Recognize that you are a complex, well trained, feeling, and yet thoughtful individual. Learn to use your life skills in both your personal and your professional life and become more genuine.
How? Here's a list of easy-to-get-moving ideas:
On the job:
1. Start learning to trust your gut or intuition in business, some things just don't feel right and when they don't listen to yourself
2. Act more like successful entrepreneurs do by becoming a little closer with those around you, get to know them a bit
3. Don't be afraid to get emotional, after all you're paid to have an opinion
4. Don't get too full of yourself. People make mistakes and have bad days, when they do, note it but cut them some slack. And when they are great, note that too and make a big deal about it.
At home:
1. Don't be a walking computer incapable of emotion – show some fun, some love, and a great deal of care for those around you.
2. Use the lessons you've picked up writing business plans to map out your financial situation and ensure it's sound and growing
3. Count to 10 before responding to your loved one's comments, everyone can have a bad day, so give her/him some slack
4. Go out of your way to talk about what happened on the job today, share your "other" life with those you care about.
Bonus:
5. Act with a little decorum, do you really need to live in those sweatpants every night?
Great leaders are authentic and passionate. So are great parents, great spouses and great friend. No coincidence.
(Thanks to Ramanan Jagannathan for sharing this.)
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I believe this article would seem obvious common sense to some and controversial or wrong to others -- an ideal candidate for i-TFTD whose purpose is to provoke useful thought!
Those who are not familiar with our weak attempts to wear "masks" in different situations are advised to watch the Jim Carrey movie called, "The Mask". Note that this article talks about one aspect of our behaviour, that is, about being genuine and consistent in projecting our personality in our interactions. There might be other specific aspects of work or home that are suitable to some amount of compartmentalization. For instance, in a different context, one viewpoint is, "I am not my job, my job is just one of the things I do". Another is, "Your job is your job, it's not your life."
An important point missed by many is that most of our waking life is spent at work. So treating the office as a place we just go to earn our daily bread removes immense opportunities to get more out of life in many dimensions. The word "job" has historically had negative connotations of punishment or burden whereas in modern life, realization of our true potential as a living being is largely dependent on a healthy career. Our relationships with people at work are a significant (not the only) determinant of our well-being, our learning and joy.
| #139 |
#139-1. Today you should leave the past in the past in case it becomes you. Live your life in hope, instead of letting the past and tomorrow take control of your today.
-Ivona Evans
#139-2. Maturity is accepting the responsibility and totally understanding what responsibility means. So when we say, accept the responsibility for your attitude, we mean (1) become aware of how you think and how you feel; and (2) if there is any negativity, or if it is simply not as you want to feel then change it to make it right.
-Thomas D. Willhite
#139-3. Most of our so-called reasoning consists in finding arguments for going on believing as we already do.
-James Harvey Robinson
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Too many things are perpetuated by individuals and organizations as “this is the way it has been for me/us.” Suggestions for change are often countered with an example of how it did not work out when it was tried earlier. The questions to examine are: (i) how long since it was tried? (ii) have circumstances changed since then? (iii) are there other ways to attempt it? And last, but not least, (iv) do we wish to change?
“We are like this only” is a typical Indian English phrase that was successfully converted into a snazzy TV programme title and marketing campaign by Channel V (an MTV clone) but it also captures an attitude of resistance to change. It is also the title of a recent book by an Indian marketing expert, Rama Bijapurkar.
The last one is deep. Progress in science and technology has been achieved by using our reasoning power to question prevalent beliefs, often leading to discoveries that changed those beliefs. We tend to apply selective reasoning to justify a predetermined conclusion instead of letting analysis lead to the best conclusion.
| #138: Purposeful Growth |
Interesting statements gleaned from John Maxwell's CD on Purposeful Growth
Most people settle for accidental growth. Consistently reaching higher levels requires purposeful growth.
Growth is change. Some things can only be learned with time. The closest shortcut (partial substitute) is to tap into the experience of successful mentors. The more I know, the more I realize what I need to know.
Experience is not the best teacher, evaluated experience is. Reflective thinking is needed for converting experience into insight.
Most folks spend more time every year in planning a two-week vacation than they spend planning their life.
Goal-consciousness is good but try to become more growth-conscious than goal-conscious. Goal-conscious people are exclusively destination-oriented. Growth-conscious people are primarily journey-oriented. Goal-conscious people tend to plateau more often and longer. Growth-conscious people use each destination as a milestone for re-energizing themselves for the onward journey with new goals.
(Thanks to Shekhar Parpattedar for recommending and lending the CD.)
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I rarely re-read books or listen again to non-music CDs. A few weeks ago, when I heard this CD a second time, I gathered new ideas and thought I should transcribe some of it one day for i-TFTD. Recently I heard it a third time and simply felt like sharing whatever I remember. This is not an accurate transcription.
The above are profound and powerful statements. Any attempt at giving my interpretations here would take away from the rich layers of meaning each one of us can extract.
| #137 |
#137-1. Martin Luther King Jr. didn't change the world by saying, "I have a complaint…".
-Chris Jordan
#137-2. I may be a despicable person, but when Truth speaks through me I am invincible.
-Mahatma Gandhi
#137-3. The vast majority of human beings dislike and even dread all notions with which they are not familiar. Hence it comes about that at their first appearance innovators have always been derided as fools and madmen.
-Aldous Huxley
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Martin Luther King made a simple phrase, "I have a dream…" immortal not only by his passionate speech but by rallying people into action against seemingly insurmountable odds. Personally, I find it highly ironic that it is fashionable today to say, "Don’t bother about the words…" while we are all victims of the media, advertising and PR bombardment -- all users of words as weapons.
I would like to interpret the second quote in the context of concepts or ideas. To me, it brings out the power of ideas whether conveyed through words, images or actions.
Innovation often appears as madness until proven valuable. Deliberate silliness and childlike behaviour is a recommended technique to tap into our inherent creativity. If nothing else, it makes life fun! At the risk of immodesty, this is one of the few areas I can claim to have practised and benefited.
| #136 |
#136-1. Big goals get big results. No goals get no results or somebody else's results.
-Mark Victor Hansen
#136-2. Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.
-Rene Descartes
#136-3. The father of every good work is discontent, and its mother is diligence.
-Lajos Kassak
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One price many of us pay for growing up, becoming more mature, is to forget the ability to dream. "The Magic of Thinking Big" is the title of a useful book written by David Schwartz. Google's founders never talked of building a faster or better search engine, they wanted "to know everything there is to know". Until his almost full retirement in June 2008 after over 25 years at Microsoft, Bill Gates rarely talked of achieving 90% desktop market share, he kept driving his corporation with an ambitious vision to put a computer in every desktop and every home.
Many of us miss the opportunity to capture and codify the learning associated with solving a particular problem. Great thinkers always do it.
Some amount of creative dissatisfaction with the present is useful to push towards new methods and products but pursuing it with persistence is needed for achieving results.
| #135: Mental Pushups |
By Jim Rohrbach
A case for daily affirmations.
As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-Proverbs 23:7
"Repetition of affirmations of orders to your subconscious mind is the only known method of voluntary development of the emotion of faith." Why did Napoleon Hill make this powerful statement early in his classic 1937 book, 'Think and Grow Rich'? Hill was the first author to introduce "the science of personal achievement" to the business world. He studied over 500 highly successful entrepreneurs in the early 1900s (including Henry Ford, Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell, and John D. Rockefeller... these were no flash-in-the-pan characters!) and concluded that each had what he called a "success consciousness" — they literally thought their way to riches.
I believe Hill was aware that most ordinary people did not possess this mind set, but he insisted a person could develop it through the use of "autosuggestion" — the daily repetition of powerful positive statements to program the mind for achieving desired outcomes. Thus, he was an early advocate of daily affirmations.
No less of an authority than Brian Tracy, one of the world's greatest success teachers, states, "My favorite combination of affirmations, which I've used for years, is, "'I like myself and I love my work!'" Tracy goes on to say, "Controlling your inner dialogue, the way you talk to yourself, is a key to peak performance. It is the way you overcome difficulties and keep yourself feeling positive most of the time."
Here's a definition of affirmations: Positive statements, used in the present tense as if they're already a fact, which you consciously repeat to yourself on a daily basis to redefine your personal belief system. Thus, you create new positive self-fulfilling prophecies. Just think of them as mental pushups.
Affirmations are by no means anything new. They have been referred to as "positive thinking," "positive selftalk," or even prayer — all religions appear to have affirmations in their scripture. The Old and New Testaments are chock full of them — "As thou thinkest, so thou art," "Ask, and ye shall receive," etc. I like to refer to affirmations as "attitudinal pushups" — when used consistently they will create an unstoppable positive mental attitude ("attitudinal fitness," if you will) that is essential for your success. Repetition is the key to allowing these positive statements to reprogram your mind, just as you learned your multiplication tables in grade school.
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Science is increasingly validating some of these ancient statements about the fascinating processes of the mind by researching into the physiological reactions inside the human brain. Too many people have strong beliefs in favour of or against this. The best (scientific) approach is to try out and see.
| #134 |
#134-1. I love men who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.
-Thomas Paine
#134-2. The man who has gotten everything he wants is all in favor of peace and order.
-Jawaharlal Nehru
#134-3. If you do not have peace in your life, you, like many others, have probably not fully understood its message. You receive exactly what you put out, or, "As you sow, so shall you reap."
-Thomas D. Willhite, Living Synergistically
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Smiling and feeling positive when things are going well is easy. More admirable is to be able to do that when things aren't.
Lack of peace or order could be an indication of intolerable imbalances. It is the duty of leadership to probe that and address the root cause.
The simple but profound law of cause and effect operates at multiple levels. We know it but try to forget or ignore it. The heart-rending situation in the Mumbai terror attack of November 2008 makes many wonder, "Why? How to prevent such random killing of innocents?" While the authorities analyze and execute a logical course of action, I am struck by the statements of a spiritual guru (my paraphrasing): Nothing much has fundamentally changed in the forces driving the human mind. Unless we collectively do something about the violence inside each of our minds, disastrous actions by humans are likely to recur in different forms.
| #133 |
#133-1. We change when it hurts too much not to change.
-Rosabeth Moss Kanter, Harvard professor
#133-2. Before growth can occur, we must have change.
-Thomas D. Willhite
#133-3. It is necessary to change before it is necessary to change.
Because when it is necessary to change, it is already too late.
-Anon
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Fashion industry pundits, it is said, know that people like things presented as new and different but in reality are not very different from the familiar.
Change does not guarantee improvement but not changing guarantees non-improvement.
Denying or resisting change is avoidable; anticipating and adapting to change is useful; inducing and influencing change is a hallmark of leadership.
| #132 |
#132-1. A very large amount of human suffering and frustration is caused by the fact that many men and women are not content to be the sort of beings that God has made them, but try to persuade themselves that they are really beings of some different kind.
-Eric Mascall
#132-2. Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
-Dwight Eisenhower
#132-3. Vain, very vain is my search to find;
that happiness which only centers in the mind.
-Oliver Goldsmith
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I find the first one to be profound.
The second is to be read carefully. With the power of position or authority or strong persuasion I can get others to do what I want because I want them to do it, but the real influencing of a leader is when I get them to want to do it. Not through manipulation but by alignment of goals.
| #131: Children's Day Special |
November 14, the birthday of Jawaharlal Nehru, the first Prime Minister of independent India, is celebrated as Children’s Day. Here's a special bonus edition of i-TFTD:
#131-1. If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.
-Abigail Van Buren
#131-2. You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
-Franklin P. Jones
#131-3. Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.
-H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
#131-4. First you have to teach a child to talk, then you have to teach it to be quiet.
-Prochnow
#131-5. Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?
-Jane Nelson
#131-6. Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist.
-Michael Levine
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Substitute children in the above with subordinates and parent with leader, to get useful insights on career development, leadership qualities and giving feedback. The last one is a killer: merely having people report into you does not make you a leader.
| #130: The Whale Story |
(A Case of Management by Motivation)
By Charles and Carla Coonradt
Have you ever wondered how whale and dolphin trainers get the 19,000-pound whale, to jump 22 feet out of the water and perform tricks?
They get that whale to go over a rope higher than most of us can imagine. This is a great challenge - as great as the ones you will face within the next five years as you manage small teams of people who report to you. However their approach is almost opposite of what is taught by most leading business schools and corporate houses.
So how do the trainers at Sea World do it? Their number one priority is to reinforce the behavior that they want repeated - in this case, to get the whale or dolphin to go over the rope. They influence the environment every way they can so that it supports the principle of making sure that the whale just can't fail.
They start with the rope kept well below the surface of the water, in a position where the whale can't help but do what's expected of it. Every time the whale goes over the rope (which is below the water), it gets positive reinforcement. It gets fed fish, patted, played with, and most important, it gets that encouraging reinforcement.
But what happens when the whale goes under the rope?
Nothing – no failure notices, no constructive criticism, no developmental feedback, nor warnings in the personnel file. Whales are taught that their negative behavior will simply not be acknowledged. Positive reinforcement is the cornerstone of that simple principle that produces such spectacular results. And as the whale begins to go over the rope more often than under, the trainers begin to raise the rope slowly. Each time the whale goes over the rope it receives positive pats and fish. However each time it fails, it is ignored but not punished.
Slowly the rope is raised over the water level until finally it is raised 20 feet above water. However it must be raised slowly enough so that the whale doesn't fail. The process ensures success, but at a pace that makes it possible for the whale to do so out of a positive strength that makes it strong and more confident of its attempts physically and emotionally.
What do B Schools and the corporate world teach you?
As naive managers the first thing we would do would be to get that rope right up there at 22 feet .We call that goal-setting, or strategic planning or even benchmark planning. Most B Schools would tell you stretch your potential and set high goals from day 1.
With the goal clearly defined, we now have to figure out a way to motivate the whale. So we take a bucket of fish and put it right above that 22-foot rope - don't pay the whale unless it performs. Next we have to give directions. We lean over from our nice high and dry perch and say, "Jump Whale!" but obviously the whale stays right where it is scared to even try.
The simple lesson to be learned from the whale trainers is to over-celebrate. Make a big deal out of the good and little stuff that we want consistently.
Secondly, under-criticize. Most people know when they screw up. What they need is help. If we under-criticize, punish and discipline less than is expected, people will not forget the event, learn self responsibility and usually not repeat mistakes.
In my opinion, most successful businesses today are doing things right more than 75 percent of the time. Yet what do they spend the majority of their time focussing on? Only on the 25 % of the times when things go wrong and the people who were responsible for this failure.
We need to set up the circumstances so that people can't fail.
Over-celebrate, under-criticize . . . and know how far to raise the rope and at what speed.
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We are not whales; all people do not react the same way; carrot-and-stick is a reality of business life; one should not artificially praise average quality work as though it is excellent; just ignoring cannot work in all cases -- let us keep aside many such potential objections, valid or otherwise. Is there something worthwhile to think about and change in our approach to our teams?
Forget over-celebrating, we should at least try to consciously find situations periodically to acknowledge and appreciate a person's or team's achievement. "Finally the software was released but let us wait to see how the User Acceptance Test (UAT) goes before sending congratulatory mail." "A better time to take the team for dinner would be after the system goes live successfully." "This is not such a big deal, we have faced bigger challenges and worked on much more complex assignments and delivered."
Questions to help refute the above kind of thinking are:
-Is there something worth acknowledging in terms of effort and an intermediate culmination of that effort? Could it be sent to the individuals concerned even if it is not marked to other senior managers?
-Will all the concerned persons be around if we wait for a bigger milestone in future? Should a small timely praise be necessarily substituted by so-called bigger reward after a delay?
-Is there a risk that the future milestone is delayed so much and circumstances are such that the mood is far from celebratory?
-Are we always measuring someone's achievement against an absolute benchmark or reinforcing a relatively commendable effort under the specific circumstances?
-Are we modifying our expectations and responses based on whether someone is new to a role, whether the constraints were avoidable or outside one's control?
Finally, do note that the rope was being raised every time. I do not know about whales but if we keep hitting easy targets and getting rewards it leads us to complacency, mediocrity and even dissatisfaction.
| #129 |
#129-1. People laugh because I am different, but I laugh because they are all the same.
-Anon
#129-2. Don't use words too big for the subject. Don't say "infinitely" when you mean "very"; otherwise you'll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite.
-C.S. Lewis
#129-3. Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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In today's hypercompetitive, media-defined world every product is attempted to be portrayed as different. It is fashionable to say I am different. Not to say so would be really different. The trick is to recognize that each of us is truly different from others and not pretend to conform for the sake of comfort.
When exaggeration is rampant, loose and casual use of words is considered acceptable. It is funny to notice that my interest in precision increases with my knowledge as does my awareness of my ignorance. When I do not know the language, I tend to say, "Don't nitpick on the words!"
Recognizing beauty is a talent to be nurtured. Then we start finding more of it wherever we look.
| #128: Instant Learning |
Looking around the room, I found 7 secrets of success:
The roof said: Aim high
The fan said: Be cool
The clock said: Every minute is precious
The mirror said: Reflect before you act
The window said: See the world
The calendar said: Be up-to-date
The door said: Push hard to achieve your goals
-Anon
(Thanks to Rashmi Chaturvedi for sharing this. Many of you have been contributing or providing feedback on i-TFTD. I may not always individually respond but please note that it is appreciated.)
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I have had participants in training sessions do a similar exercise where the objective is to come up with one or more learnings related to leadership, from some inanimate object (preferably from nature). Every time people come out with excellent points. Try it. This is the basis of many creative thinking "techniques" that use a random trigger in the form of a word, phrase or picture. Edward De Bono has explained why such triggers are necessary, in dozens of his books.
How does this happen? Maybe most fundamentals are things we intuitively know or have heard before, the analogy exercise simply reminds us. I find it interesting that each of us has the capability to relate seemingly unrelated ideas in a useful way. And I find it curious that we seldom utilize this ability to come up with out-of-the-box solutions to situations.
| #127: The 90/10 Principle by Stephen Covey |
Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life.
What is the 90/10 Principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean?
We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%. How? By your reaction.
You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react. Let's use an example.
You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase.
Your day has started terribly. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.
Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened.
Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's OK honey, you just need to be more careful next time." Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.
Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction. Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off! Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? Who cares if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive?
Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it. You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.
Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it. The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seems to be success in life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships.
Worry consumes time. Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel.
Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle. It will change your life.
| #126 |
#126-1. Everyone who has achieved financial independence will tell you that -- at least in the early days -- you have to work smarter and harder. The price of success must be paid in full, and it must be paid in advance. There are no shortcuts.
-John Cummuta
#126-2. Most misfortunes are the results of misused time.
-Napoleon Hill
#126-3. Spend each moment perfecting the next, not correcting the last.
-Scott Michael Durski
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We waste too much time complaining or feeling dejected about not achieving or getting something whereas we know that any effort and action in the form of hard work or smart work towards the desired goal would be a better use of our time.
Another mistake is to focus too much on the past, trying to make our past look or sound better whereas we need to orient our thoughts and analytical power on the future.
| #125: Festival of Lights Special |
Wishing you and your near ones a happy festival season.
#125-1. There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle, or to be the mirror that reflects it.
-Edith Wharton
#125-2. A smile is the lighting system of the face, the cooling system of the head and the heating system of the heart.
-Anon
#125-3. Evil is like a shadow - it has no real substance of its own, it is simply a lack of light. You cannot cause a shadow to disappear by trying to fight it, stamp on it, by railing against it, or any other form of emotional or physical resistance. In order to cause a shadow to disappear, you must shine light on it.
-Shakti Gawain
#125-4. I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.
-Og Mandino
#125-5. If there is light in the soul, there will be beauty in the person
If there is beauty in the person, there will be harmony in the house
If there is harmony in the house, there will be order in the nation
If there is order in the nation, there will be Peace in the World.
-Chinese Proverb
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Teachers and authors are like mirrors who can help the light of wisdom illuminate places that it cannot otherwise reach.
Smiling makes you and those around you feel brighter. It can also cause shadows of unsolved problems disappear.
Periods of darkness have their own value, they make us act, they also increase our appreciation and gratitude when light is restored.
Inner peace of individuals is a pre-requisite for a peaceful external environment.
| #124: Sometimes Newspapers Have Good Stuff |
Some interesting snippets from contemporary events.
#124-1. (The Chandrayaan-1 mission) will also be a precursor to India's manned mission to space… And it's just the right thing for the younger generation — it will get them out of a certain mundaneness. If the youth needed something exciting, this is it.
-U R Rao, Former chairman, ISRO in The Economic Times 22-Oct-2008
(Full interview at http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/Chandrayaan-I_will_lead_to_Indian_on_Moon/articleshow/3626482.cms)
#124-2. Can it really be a coincidence that within weeks of the Large Hadron Collider being switched on for the first time a financial black hole has appeared in the universe?
-Barclay Price (Letter to the editor published in The Economist dated 16-Oct-2008)
#124-3. Some mortgage broker in Los Angeles gives subprime "liar loans" to people who have no credit ratings so they can buy homes in Southern California. Those flimsy mortgages get globalized through the global banking system and, when they go sour, they eventually prompt banks to stop lending, fearful that every other bank's assets are toxic, too. The credit crunch hits Iceland, which went on its own binge. Meanwhile, the police department of Northumbria, England, had invested some of its extra cash in Iceland, and, now that those accounts are frozen, it may have to reduce street patrols this weekend.
-Thomas Friedman in The New York Times 18-Oct-2008
(Full article at http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/19/opinion/19friedman.html?ref=opinion)
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I found it interesting that the space scientist has chosen to highlight the impact on youth in terms of excitement. Bright young people always look for getting out of mundaneness so the onus of guiding them to achieve that clearly falls on the experienced folk who either succeeded or failed in achieving that in their youth.
Funny remarks apart, there are no easy answers to the dilemma of letting scientific research venturing into risky territory (such as cloning) and people’s fear about damaging consequences. Even if laws do not permit certain experiments, what prevents a rogue scientist to pursue a “purely scientific”, morals-free action?
Tom Friedman has a way of describing trends that helps make sense of disparate items of news. His article starts with, “Who knew that Iceland was just a hedge fund with glaciers?” And goes on to say, “We’re all connected and nobody is in charge.” The award-winning journalist and author has written a few bestseller books. I enjoyed “From Beirut to Lebanon” and “The World is Flat” though some might find his American-style, breathless bombardment irritating.
| #123 |
#123-1. With so little time, there are just not enough minutes left to hate, not enough time for gossip or fighting. We should all be so busy "doing" and "being" that we have no time left for anything but accomplishing "good".
-Thomas D. Willhite
#123-2. If you want something you never had, do something you have never done.
-Anon
#123-3. Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time.
-Leo Buscaglia
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Most irritating or frustrating situations seem silly and insignificant when viewed after a while. Could we train to reach that "after-a-while" perspective while in the situation?
We often make the mistake of doing the same things and expecting something different. At least some senior colleagues and I tried doing something different recently, performing a dance on stage in an annual corporate event. From what I could gather it was a small but satisfying personal victory to let our hair down and be ridiculous -- with plenty of practice!
It helps to view life as an adventure or enchanting mystery rather than as a puzzle to solve quickly using the help of some "ultimate" technique or "proven" forecasting model. Very few do it, as shown by the increasing popularity of a variety of services such as astrology and past-life therapy.
| #122: The Case of the Bonsai Manager |
Short excerpts from the book, "The Case of the Bonsai Manager: Lessons from Nature on Growing" by R Gopalakrishnan
R. Gopalakrishnan has been a professional manager for forty years, with a wealth of practical managerial experience, initially in Unilever and more recently as executive director of Tata Sons based in Mumbai. He has lived and worked in India, the United Kingdom and Saudi Arabia and has travelled extenseively all over the world.
His book is about nature, management and intuitive leadership. Gopalakrishnan says his book is not a 30-day guide to solve management problems. After the required analysis is done, gut instinct should take over as intuition will be a key differentiator for excellence in the future, he says.
Bonsai manager: How a manager becomes stunted
A stunted manager is one who is operating and working at a level which is well below his potential. He himself is the best judge of this, because he can sense such a condition better than anyone else. He would probably exhibit certain characteristics and attitudes which would indicate to other people that he is working in this manner.
He may, for example, come through as a person who is not very involved or very happy with his work. Worse, he may have given up trying to change this position and may have reconciled to it. This would make him look like a 'tired' manager who does not have the motivation to do something about his situation for many possible reasons.
The disinclination to change the environment around him could be because he is more concerned with security than with satisfaction. It could be that he finds it too much of a bother to seek change. It may be that he is low on self-esteem and is worried about the consequences of trying to alter his situation. Reasons such as these cause him to continue with his unsatisfying predicament to the stage when this very situation becomes normal for him.
At some point of time, his characteristics and attitude become somewhat irreversible. Reviving his managerial learning and motivation becomes very difficult, or not worth the effort on the part of the organization.
This is when he can be considered to have become a permanently stunted manager -- it is the stage beyond which it is difficult to make him 'grow' again in a managerial sense. Such managers can be seen in large as well as small companies, multinationals and the public sector, almost everywhere.
The message is that the 'space' in which a manager grows is extremely important. This space around his job is defined by the manager by four perceptions.
-The nature of his industry and company;
-The type of work he does and his role within his organization;
-The people relationships he is involved with; and
-The threats or obstacles he faces and has to overcome.
If the space in which the manager operates and grows is limited, if his emotional and mental exertion are low, then his developments gets stunted. If he stays in this stultifying situation for long and does nothing to change his circumstance, then he can become a permanently stunted manager!
Just as the growth of the crocodile depends on the diet and the space available, the growth of a manager too is influenced by his 'mental' food (reading, training, and people challenges) as well as the experimental space (new experience and tough assignments that disturb him from his comfort zone). Nobody sets out to become a stunted manager. Yet stunted managers do exist, in large numbers.
Because of inadequate challenge and learning arising from working at the grassroots of company operations, young managers can get stunted in their growth at a very early stage of their career. The truly big and successful managers are set to solve problem after problem, they are constantly challenged to swim upstream against the tide so that they learn and grow fast.
The Case of the Bonsai Manager: Lessons from Nature on Growing
by R. Gopalakrishnan
Foreword by Ratan N. Tata
Publisher: Penguin Books India
Price: Rs 450
| #121 |
#121-1. People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing -- that's why we recommend it daily.
-Zig Ziglar
#121-2. Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.
-Margaret Cousins
#121-3. Peace is not the absence of conflict in life but the ability to cope with it.
-Anon
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Regular attention to motivation is needed not only to your team but to yourself as well.
It helps me to remember the many meanings (all positive) of this powerful word, as in, praise (appreciation award), understanding (art appreciation), empathy (I appreciate your opposing viewpoint), increase in value (portfolio appreciation) and gratitude (they appreciated my presence in the event).
I can be at peace in the midst of a long struggle.
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